We are rejoicing and overjoyed with the news and my heart is extremely full! But at the same time, my heart is extremely heavy and my heart hurts deeply for other friends I know who fought those same battles with a child but did not get the same outcome; and whose journey was changed for ever and taken down a road they did not want to go.
I know that God has a purpose and plan for everything. That God's timing is not our timing and His ways are not our ways. I know that only He has all the answers and only He knows the reasons for why things happen the way they do... but it doesn't make it any easier to understand.
What it does do, it cause us to make a choice. There are many times in our lives when we pray for things, pray for people, pray for circumstances. Sometimes the answers are exactly what we prayed for... sometimes we don't understand the answers... sometimes we wait and wait for answers that still haven't come. But regardless of what those answers are, we have a choice to make. Are we going to trust in God no matter what, even when we don't get the answers we are searching for, or are we going to turn our backs and walk away because we think God doesn't listen anyway?
I have learned in my own life, that preparing is the most important part. You can't prepare for the journey, for the events or actions that happen in your life, but you can prepare for how you will deal with it. You can prepare by talking to God every day; by searching His word when things are good, (not just when they are bad) so that when trials come His words will hold you up and get you through. You can prepare by surrounding yourself with people who can hold you up when you cannot stand.
I am thankful for a God who is bigger than I am. I am thankful for a God who is always there even when I may not talk to Him as often as I should. I am thankful for friends and family who stand in the gap with me and pray along side of me; especially when I have no words left to pray myself. And it's because of all these things, that my choice will ALWAYS be... to trust in God, no matter what!
So through tears I rejoice with Bekah and her family and so many others who are receiving good news in their own circumstances; and through tears I continue to share the pain of those whose journey's took them on a different path and who are still choosing to continue to trust in God... No Matter What!
For you have been my refuge, a strong tower against the foe.
I long to dwell in your tent forever and take refuge in the
shelter of your wings.
For you, God, have heard my vows;
You have given me the heritage of those who fear your name.